We began Ferberizing again over the weekend. Nate had finished his course of antibiotics and was basically snot free. He's teething...but he always seems to be teething. We figured it was either go back to Ferber or sleep in forty minute increments for the rest of eternity.
I hate the process and love it at the same time. The hate part? I don't have a thick skin when it comes to Nate crying out for me. I want to go to him and make everything better. It physically hurts me to hear him scream and cry. But the problem is - I can't make everything better. He NEEDS to get used to going back to sleep without my assistance or the three of us will never get a good night's sleep. Ugh. I so wish I could just nurse him or rock him to sleep and then he would sleep the entire night through like when he was three months old. But it doesn't work that way for us. Does it sound like I'm trying to convince myself? I guess I am, because after four nights there is still a good amount of crying. Not for long periods, but frequently (usually every one to three hours).
The love part? I do see improvement. He cries for a minute or two when we initially put him down to sleep, but he settles down very quickly. Those few minutes of pain absolutely beat rocking and rocking and rocking over twenty pounds and thirty inches of baby. Then doing it again forty minutes later. And then an hour later. And then...you get the idea. And I have hope. The second night he slept for a stretch of over six hours, which he hasn't done in forever. And although he wakes frequently, we usually don't have to go in at all - he settles down before the first time increment is up.
Hopefully we'll continue to see improvement. And hopefully he won't get sick again for awhile. Now we have to tackle those naps...