Friday, October 8, 2010

Mother of the Year Confessions

My entire life I've tended to have a lazy, procrastinating streak. And if things didn't come easy, I was likely to give up or not try at all. (Which is why I really related to that NurtureShock book.)  But with Nate things are different. It doesn't matter if I am tired, sick, hungry or cranky. I have always tried my hardest to be the best possible mother I can to Nate. I have pushed away every lazy instinct in my body and tried to do the right thing. Even when I was so exhausted I felt I had nothing more to give, I dug down and found the energy.

But I am only human. And as hard as I try I slip. We all do. I'm not talking about losing your mind and giving your two month old a time out in the closet or anything. I'm just talking about those little moments when I do exactly the thing I said I would never do...because it's just the easier thing to do. My girlfriends and I call these "Mother of the Year" moments.

I was reading a blog post today (at Render Me Mama) about "Mommy Confessions." She detailed some of these little "less than perfect" moments and I so related. I told her about one of my latest Mother of the Year moments. I was having a rough day and really needed the support of my far away friend on the phone. Nate was not happy and I found myself doing anything to appease him just so I could have a few moments to finish my conversation. "What, Nate? You don't like that I am on the phone and don't have my undivided attention? What, Nate? You want something to eat, even though you just had lunch?" Before I knew it, Nate was half naked eating graham crackers on top the dirty washing machine. Mommy of the Year!

And today, I had another. It's been a long week of poor sleeping due to Nate's cold. He napped only 25 minutes for the entirety of the day. That's a long shift with no break. And my home is a mess. So I did the thing I swore I would never do. I plopped Nate down in front of the television in his pack and play and he watched Sesame Street while I cleaned up in the kitchen and just took a break. I know this is not horrible. But I really, really don't want to start using the television as a babysitter because then I will never stop. Cut to the scene of Nate watching Sprout for hours in his dirty diaper while I eat bon bons and order costume jewelry from QVC.

So come on, fess up. What are your "Mother of the Year" moments?

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Did you hear? I'm writing for now! You can view my page here. Check out my article on our pediatrician HERE. She's a lactation consultant and she's awesome. But don't read it if you're prone to fits of jealousy over other people's fantastic doctors.  
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