Tuesday, June 7, 2011

It's Pat

I've mentioned that Nate's a talker. And the kid yammers all day, whether we're home or out. At eighteen months he pointed to his bottom and proudly told the clerk at Best Buy it was his, "BUTT!" Awesome. Then there was the time Nate let every. single. person. in Whole Foods know, "MOMMY STINKY!"  Fantastic. I couldn't help but laugh and wonder oh my god, what are we teaching him at home?! The only saving grace was that Nate's speech wasn't as clear as it is now and not everyone understood him. I hope. He got a lot of nods and smiles.

Now Nate insists on being acknowledged.  He demands to be understood. I can't nod and smile at him, or even change the subject. He'll assume I don't understand him and call my bluff.  And that works out really well with his desire to point at and label everyone we see. BABY! BOY! GUR! GUY! MAHN! WUH-MAHN! I usually try to quietly acknowledge with an "uh-huh" or a "yep."


But sometimes, actually more often than I would think possible, the gender of the person is indeterminate. Yesterday in the grocery store he pointed at a person walking alongside us, "BOY?!" Say hi, honey. "MOMMY, BOY?!" Why don't you wave and say hi, sweetie. "BOY?! Mommy, BOY?! Oops, honey, I think we forgot something in the next aisle over, why don't we just turnaround... "BOY?!" Oh look, there we are again. Say hi...  I really need to work on the pointing thing with Nate.

I couldn't confirm or deny the gender of the person because (a) the person was standing six inches from us for what seemed like an eternity, and (2) I really couldn't figure out the gender. Awkward, Nate. Awkward. I should mention that the person in question was a bit different. And my only hope, as we walked alongside this person (no matter how fast or slow I went or how many times I tried to switch direction) was that the person was mentally challenged enough to not realize what was going on. Have you ever wished a complete stranger was super mentally retarded? Um, yeah... me neither...

Does your child ever embarrass you in public?
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