Sunday, October 2, 2011

Cave dwelling

When Nate was born, I thought I would be lucky to stay home six months with him. I never imagined I'd be able to stay home with him for this long, and I am so grateful.  Sure staying at home is super glamorous - when I'm home I get to wear comfy drawstring pants (Nate thinks it's hilarious to pull them down - repeatedly), when I leave the house I usually have food or boogers on me, and I am rollin' in munchkins (the donut holes, not the little people). That said, it is not for everyone and it can certainly be far more challenging than my paying jobs ever were. But I love it. I feel like I'm doing something really important, something I'm good at doing. But I've never referred to myself as a stay-at-home mom. Probably because it has never felt permanent. I've been looking for work for quite awhile and if asked what I do, I define myself by saying - well, I was that and now I want to do this - rather than go for the SAHM title.

One of the more annoying results of my staying at home is that for the past two years I might as well have been living under a rock. I am now shamefully unaware about what is going on in the world. It's embarrassing.  I'm not even quite sure how I got my news before Nate. I've never been an actually paper newspaper person - newsprint makes my skin crawl - so I guess I got my info from a mixture of online papers, television and public radio. And you know, talking to other adults regularly. I had a pretty good grasp on current affairs.  But now, I have no idea what is going unless my husband mentions it. Horrible.

See how responsible and aware I was before Nate?

I have no excuse for this behavior. But I do have several logistical reasons. These are some of the problems: I don't want Nate to watch too much tv and the only shows he is usually allowed to watch are Sesame Street, Fireman Sam and Blue's Clues.  Other than Nate's tv time, I try to keep it off. So morning and evening news are out. I suppose I could DVR the evening news and watch it when I'm "off duty" at 8:30pm, but by that point I am so beat that I'm craving happy things and/or mindless entertainment. Like catching up with Dave or watching Vampire Diaries.  Even though I blog regularly, I feel like I'm on the computer very little - usually during Nate's always short nap time. Aside from blogging, searching for jobs and uploading my hundreds of pictures of Nate, I don't have the patience or time to sit at my desk. I really need a laptop.

Since I finally upgraded to a smart phone recently, I thought the answer might lie in finding a good news app. But if Nate's occupying himself for a few moments and I have time to play on my phone for a minute, I am much more likely to pull up Words with Friends than the BBC.

Again, totally inexcusable and I need to take action. I need to make time for important things. Don't even get me started on the lack of exercising. Maybe I should just buy some thin gloves so I can hold the icky newsprint while I do crunches during nap time.
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